we're coming over. get away.

0M3L3TT3 R3C1P3

In Recipes on November 5, 2009 at 12:20 am

[A regular series of recipes, as dictated by bassist Joe Stuhff]

OMELETTES

an overview;
an understatement;
OMELETTES are eggs whipped up and cooked into a roundish shaped, and filled with a variety of mostly breakfast-type items.
OMELETTES
a realistic opinion;
OMELETTES are great!
an end to digression;
I digress. The pearl of this oyster of contemplation, OMELETTES, are nothing more than the most potentially fulfilling experience a mere carbon-based life form can hope to achieve.
A humble submission;  ….

………….
OMELETTES
You Can TOO!

HAVE:
+At least 5 eggs
+Butter
+Milk
+Salt
+Pepper
+Dill, fresh or dried
+Nutmeg
+Cayenne Pepper
+Hot Sauce
+Large, non-stick skillet
+Rubber Spatula
+A large mixing bowl
+A fork or whisk
*SPOILER ALERT*

HEAT THE PAN, WITH BUTTER ON IT, TO MEDIUM HIGH BEFORE ADDING EGGS.
Take your selected clean, dry American-made pan and rub its cooking surface liberally with an extra-smeary stick of butter, until you can’t touch it without licking your fingers.Heat it until the butter is melting, but not burning. Don’t let this go on for more than ten minutes.
HEAT THE PAN, WITH BUTTER ON IT, TO MEDIUM HIGH BEFORE ADDING EGGS.

The theory of practical application;
Break open all eggs into bowl. Break yolks apart and mix until an even color is acheived. Add salt, pepper, and just a splash or two of milk. Mix until the consistency is conducent to air capture in small bubbles in the egg mixture. Fold the egg for no less than 30 seconds, Earth time.
HEAT THE PAN, WITH BUTTER ON IT, TO MEDIUM HIGH BEFORE ADDING EGGS.

How to fold the eggs;
Hold the bowl in one hand. hold a fork or whisk in the other. Achieve the maximum spin on the agitation instrument in the bowl, while grazing the surface of the egg lightly, working into about halfway deep, spinning constantly. If done correctly, the whole mixture will become quite bubbly (see “Bukkakke Froth”).
HEAT THE PAN, WITH BUTTER ON IT, TO MEDIUM HIGH BEFORE ADDING EGGS.

Add the spices you prefer. I like the spices listed, find them to be the best, and will go Cage-Match on anyone whose opinion differs.
Dill-Imparts a freshness and savor eggs lack, while cleaning their “farty” taste, and makes your OMELETTE burps much more enjoyable.
Nutmeg-Put big shavings of nutmeg in, just go friggin nuts. do it. Gives a piney meatlike presence to the eggs, and its oils create texture in the eggs.
Cayenne-Little dab’ll doya.

HEAT THE PAN, WITH BUTTER ON IT, TO MEDIUM HIGH BEFORE ADDING EGGS.

Add the spiced egg froth to the surface of the medium-high heat pan. after about 30 seconds, start working your rubber spatula down under the lip of the circle of eggy goo, pushing the cooked section toward the middle. As the bottom cooks, you must lift the edge and watch the uncooked egg run beneath, forming layers and allowing no part to become brown and crusty (yet!)
Once the eggs are one- third cooked, start scraping the uncooked egg off the top and folding it under, until you reach almost-cooked egg. Now, take a deep breath and flip that shiz.
DON’T BREAK IT!
Once it has been flipped, you only have a minute or two to add your fillings. I suggest;

Cheese-Cheddar, Swiss, Provolone, Gruyere, Brie, Havarti
Meats-Bacon, Ham, Pancetta, Turkey
Veggies-Onion, Pepper, Cooked Spinach, Mushrooms, Green Apples

Application of toppings as follows;
I like to sizzle my toppings briefly in the pan next to my OMELETTE, then add it when it’s a little steamy. This makes the cheese melt very quickly. Fold the OMELETTE shut, and cook each side, flipping once, for 2 to 3 minutes. A wonderful browning effect will occur.

Voila! The height of the Western World’s culture is not sublime, but edible. It is the TASTE which is sublime. Ruminate upon the humble peasant heritage of all fancy, high effort/low cost/technique-dependant foodstuffs with a French name. EAT.

-=HN=-

 

[Kai]

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